In approximately 4 weeks time, I’m moving out of this house. I’ve lived here with L & A and S since early February, and L & A (as I’ve mentioned before) have been my biggest support in terms of recovery from my eating disorder. I’ve had some tough love and a whole lotta love and I’m a bit scared I won’t be able to cope without it. Okay. I guess I will. But it will be hard, and I really don’t want to deal with hard things.
So I’m going to miss this boy, who has become like a “big little brother” to me:
And this lady who has kissed my forehead every night before bed, painted my nails, prayed with me, distracted me from my eating disordered brain on many occasions and given me so much of her time, energy and sanity:
And that lovely lady’s husband, who I don’t really have a picture of – but he’s tall and skinny and has no hair and loses his glasses a lot – I’ll miss him too.
And lastly, this dog. She sleeps on my bed, puts up with the constant cuddles I seem to give her and thinks I’m the best because I walk her every day:
I feel like I’m running out of time. I have 4 weeks to find somewhere to live. 4 weeks to find a job again. 4 weeks to feel like I can work again without feeling stressed about food and potentially have panic attacks. 4 weeks to feel like I can cope not having L & A’s seemingly endless support and love. I know it’s just another chapter in the book, and I’m certain God has this fantastic plan – but I’m not too great with change and this is one change that makes me feel deeply sad – and scared.