Dear You.

Hey there, you. Reader.

If you’re reading this, it’s either because I made you, or because you’re re-reading it just for shits and gigs, or maybe because it means something to you. I hope it’s the latter, because I’m writing this for a purpose – I’m writing this to remind you of WHY you’re doing what you’re doing right now – that is, being here, and fighting the battle you’re fighting. I’m writing this because I want to remind you that right now, even though it seems as though you’ll never overcome this, that one day you will. I’m writing this to remind you that some days are harder than others and some days you might slip backwards. Some days you might make no progress. Some days you just might want to quit – and sometimes you might just even give in to that temptation, devote yourself solely to relapse. Continue reading

So this thing happened…

Where I became really pissed off at the system and how crap it is and how hard it is to access care, and I wrote this letter to Jillian Skinner (the minister for health here in Aus) and I’d really appreciate it if you gave it a squiz and got pissed off too. ‘Kay, thanks.
Continue reading

taking a moment to just not care.

On Tuesday, I had a fairly average, tiring day. I was quite distressed by various foods that I’d eaten and as a result, had experienced a big panic attack which was incredibly frightening. I slept a lot of the afternoon after that, hoping to make the rest of the day go as quickly as it possibly could.   Continue reading

In 2 or 4 or 5 Years Time…

Lately, I’ve been out of touch with my blog. In fact, I’ve been out of touch for pretty much the last year and a half. I apologise for that. It’s been a rough 18 months and I’m managing to slowly clamber back out of this ED hole I tripped back into – so here we are. Blogging again. Hopefully it starts to become a regular thing and can be of use to people! Plus, I’ve missed chu guys. Given I’ve not been writing as regularly, I’m a little out of practice at skilfully stringing sentences together – I apologise in advance for that too. Let’s see how we go, shall we?! Continue reading

P is for Perception.

Today’s blog post is about the role that perception can play when it comes to eating disorders – about the accuracy (or inaccuracy) that an individual might have when it comes to perceiving their bodies and what they truly look like.

It’s no secret that often, people who are suffering with an eating disorder can have a distorted view of themselves – ie, they perceive themselves as bigger than they are, or perhaps even see themselves as overweight – despite being underweight or within a healthy weight range. This is generally linked to Anorexia Nervosa, but is not only limited to that particular disorder. Continue reading

Have you checked the children? (guest blogger)

Hola,

This post is something a very excellent friend of mine has penned for ye all. It’s an extremely good read and I highly recommend you all have a looksies. Essentially, she takes a look at the concepts of “opportunity” and “permission” and highlights the importance of self-accountability. So go on. Why are you still reading my words? Continue reading

V is for Value (s)

Lately I’ve been thinking about my values –  mulling over what it is that is most important to me, the things in my life that I love and treasure; what I want to fill my life with – and the values which I’d like to live my life by. I’ve particularly been thinking about it this evening, because I’ve essentially ditched bible study / ditched spending time with people whom I care about deeply so I can sit at home feeling sorry for myself and stay stuck in the routine that my eating disorder presently has happening.  Continue reading

You Can’t Pick & Choose.

It’s unfortunate, really – to the eating disorder, anyhow. But recovery can’t happen without giving it everything. Challenging everything. Challenging every single behaviour that your eating disorder has ever inflicted upon you, and choosing, each and every time and in each and every moment, to not engage in that particular behaviour.  Continue reading

Let’s Be Honest …

Eating disorders are sneaky little buggers. They thrive on secrecy. They love it to bits. They are dishonest, deceptive and manipulative. They trick the sufferer, and fool their (respective) loved ones. They cheat their way to power and once they’ve gained control, it’s damn hard to come back to full health, to a life before the eating disorder, to a life without it. Continue reading